My brother and I have always had a pretty good relationship. Of course, we always fought like cats and dogs growing up, but what siblings don't? I think part of the reason we are so close is because we're exactly a year apart, to the day. I've always felt like I failed him as an older sister because he never graduated high school. While he was busy not thinking about school and playing with his friends, I was busy working, trying to keep our house from foreclosing because of our mother's gambling addiction. Although I know the fault only truly lies with my parents, I just feel that if I had made different choices, so would have he.
Two years ago he met a girl, G. Since then, he's made some choices that have led him to be an alcoholic, like our father, who doesn't care much about a career, much less school.
Since I've been with NYEBoy, I've come to see that it's possible for each one of us to get a degree to be more than someone who makes $8-12 an hour. We don't have to struggle to pay the bills. We can go to school. We can do what we want, not just what we have to. I just wish my parents believed and instilled this in us as children. They failed us. But, that doesn't mean it's too late. We can still do something. We can still be someone.
We invited my brother to move in with us a few months ago, but much like my sister, after talking with my mom, he changed his mind. You see, my mom has never been one to want best for us, for whatever the reason. According to her, and half my family, school is just a way to get in debt with not much benefit. Why, you could just start working today and in ten years, make your way up the ladder. Unfortunately, times aren't like they used to be. Most people don't stay with companies for twenty, thirty, or forty years anymore. You have to want more than an $8-12 an hour job. And in order to attain one of those jobs, you have to get some type of skill and/or education.
My brother left G a few weeks ago. We've been in daily contact with him while he stays with my mom and my grandma's house. We extended our offer of moving in with us again. Then, we got the news and had to put the hold on everything. Of course, my mom took this as a chance to say "SEE THEY HAVE ENOUGH SHIT ON THEIR PLATE! DON'T MOVE DOWN THERE!" Now that we're sure we're staying, for now atleast, we've extended the offer again.
As I type this, my brother is somewhere between Birmingh@m and M0ntgomery, heading towards us. He hasn't made the decision to move in with us, but he's willing to come down for a few days to check out the city and to talk. We're hoping to convince him that he can move in with us. We can work on getting his GED over the next few months. And, he can start college this fall, if he wants to.
The baggage he carries, is not like my sister's. He doesn't have a child. He can study on his own. He knows there isn't an r in fun. He just needs help getting started and a hand to help show him the way. We're willing and able to help him. The decision is all his.
Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers this week as we try to help my brother see that there is more to life than drinking and a whore in Ut@h. I want better for him. In fact, if it weren't for A, I'd want it more for him than I do K because I know he can do this.