8 Days

The girls are going back home in 8 days. We will follow suit about 10 days later. I am both excited and anxious. I'm looking forward to spending some alone time with NYEBoy again, but I'm also nervous about how Thugboy is going to react when it's time for the girls to come back. His mother has already coaxed him into making several threatening statements over the past few weeks which lead me to the reason we didn't go back home for Thanksgiving.

I'm worried my sister will get brainwashed a bit and let him keep her for a few weeks with the promises of him meeting us later. I don't trust him. It's not a safe environment for A. He's staying a block away from the skating rink in the movie Hustle and Flow. Yeah, it may be movies, but that area is full of crackheads, hookers, and gang violence. I don't want either of the girls there, but I defiantly don't want A there alone.

If you don't mind, please keep us in your thoughts/prayers regarding this situation over the next month. I love that kid to death and so help me God if something happens to her (or K), I will... well... let's just say the cops better get to Thugboy before I do.

On a completely different note, can you believe I finished NaBloPoMo? HOLY SHIT. I'm only 33 post away from 1,000 blog post to boot. Not too shabby, eh?

Bowling

The great thing about being an adult is that you can do what you want, when you want. Saturday evening we decided to take the whole family bowling. This next week is filled with exams and the girls are leaving next Tuesday. I wanted to make sure we got one more family bonding time in before chaos ensued.

We took the crew, at 9:45 pm for bowling, pizza, popcorn, and soda! We all bowled two rounds of bowling. We ate some crispy, cheesy pizza and salty, buttery popcorn. A was getting tired towards the end of the second round, so we took the girls home and went back. NYEBoy and I bowled two more rounds together. I knew he didn't want to go back, but we had already paid $51 and there's just no way I wanted to spend that much for bowling (not including the food!) for two rounds.

I enjoyed myself. I think the crew did, too.

Do you like bowling?

New Clothes

I finally broke down and bought some new clothes this weekend at Old Navy. I picked up 3 pairs of black yoga pants. I tried on some jeans, but I just didn't like looking like an open can of biscuits. The yoga pants look cute and make my ass look bodacious!

I also picked up two striped Henleys. I even bought a shirt to wear for Christmas. I got a scarf to match one of the Henleys. I picked up a pair of glasses for K, too. All told, I NYEBoy spent $75, saved $57, and got a coupon for $10 off our next purchase of $50 or more.

I still need to get a few more things before we go back home. I don't want my family thinking I'm all frumpy around here. I love shopping, but I hate being fat and shopping!

Hinder

NYEBoy and I were driving to dinner when we heard this song playing. It was Hinder's Lips of An Angel.



"Lips Of An Angel"

Honey why you calling me so late?
It's kinda hard to talk right now.
Honey why are you crying? Is everything okay?
I gotta whisper 'cause I can't be too loud

Well, my girl's in the next room
Sometimes I wish she was you
I guess we never really moved on
It's really good to hear your voice saying my name
It sounds so sweet
Coming from the lips of an angel
Hearing those words it makes me weak

And I never wanna say goodbye
But girl you make it hard to be faithful
With the lips of an angel

It's funny that you're calling me tonight
And, yes, I've dreamt of you too
And does he know you're talking to me
Will it start a fight
No I don't think she has a clue

Well my girl's in the next room
Sometimes I wish she was you
I guess we never really moved on
It's really good to hear your voice saying my name
It sounds so sweet
Coming from the lips of an angel
Hearing those words it makes me weak

And I never wanna say goodbye
But girl you make it hard to be faithful
With the lips of an angel

It's really good to hear your voice saying my name
It sounds so sweet
Coming from the lips of an angel
Hearing those words it makes me weak

And I never wanna say goodbye
But girl you make it hard to be faithful
With the lips of an angel

And I never wanna say goodbye
But girl you make it hard to be faithful
With the lips of an angel

Honey why you calling me so late?

I hate this song. It brings me back to the Fall of 2007 when M was cheating on me with that bitch. He had it on his MySpace page and I think it may have had it as his cell phone ringtone, too. It makes me angry every time I hear it, even though I'm at peace with my decision to leave him and I'm happier now for it. Infidelity is much like an old injury. It may not affect you day-to-day, but if you hit it just right, it stings. That song hits it just right.

Do you have any songs that bring back memories (good or bad)?

Happy Thanksgiving 2009!

I hope you all had a happy Thanksgiving today. I woke up with a migraine, because why not? It started out as one of those days. The two turkeys I had thawing in the cooler overnight with ice water were still frozen despite being in the fridge for two days prior.

I was supposed to go visit kristencmcd for dinner, but an hour before I was supposed to be there, I still had 2 hours of cooking to do and I was still in my pajamas in need of a shower. I felt awful, but she still loves me. (I think.)

While I was in the middle of cooking, I heard an explosion. No worries, it was just the Pyrex that was holding my Paula Deen ham.



That's the second Pyrex piece I have bought in the last 6 months. Fucking ridiculous.

As I was getting the table ready for us to eat, the sweet potatoes caught fire in the oven. I was able to salvage them by knocking off the burnt marshmallows and trying again with another hand full. Then, as I was getting a plate from the cabinet, my elbow knocked the mashed potatoes into the floor.

After all that shit, we pulled the card table to the couch, two lawn chairs, and a step stool, raised our glasses, and said "Happy Thanksgiving"! It's a first for us, not the typical way we roll Thanksgiving style, but it is what it is this year.

For dessert we had chocolate fondue with pretzels, marshmallows, grapes, pineapples, brownies, and graham crackers. We have a pecan pie and vanilla ice cream that we never touched still waiting on us. I managed to forget the macaroni and cheese, corn, and something else, that I can't even remember now.

I'm exhausted, but everyone left the table happy and full. The turkey and dressing were moist and not burnt, I consider that alone a job well done, despite the bumps in the road along the way.

Show & Tell: Holiday Must Have

For this Thanksgiving edition of Show & Tell, I'm sharing with you my holiday dish must-have.

It's spinach dip.




Here's the recipe on the back of the package.

1 package (10 oz.) baby spinach, chopped or 1 package (10 oz.) frozen chopped spinach, thawed and squeezed dry
1 container (16 oz.) sour cream
1 cup Hellmann's® or Best Foods® Real Mayonnaise
1 package Knorr® Vegetable recipe mix
1 can (8 oz.) water chestnuts, drained and chopped (optional)
3 green onions, chopped (optional)

Just mix all of the ingredients and chill at least 2 hours. I prefer overnight. I don't personally do the green onions, but I feel the chest nuts are a must for that extra crunch. It's to die for.

We serve it in a King's Hawaiian bread bowl with extra rolls on the side. I usually split the extra rolls into 4-8 bite size pieces. It makes it easier to dip on and inhale eat.

What's your favorite Thanksgiving (or Holiday) must-have?

The Crazy Shit She Says: Make A Wish

We spent some family time downtown at the local museum Saturday. It was very spur of the moment, so we really didn't get to spend as much time as I would have liked exploring the science area, but it was fun for the hour or so we were there. Afterwards we walked around outside on the plaza soaking up the lovely Talla.hassee weather and sunset.

This conversation happened near one of the fountains.

A: Can I hab a penny for duh fountain?

Me: Let me see if I have something. *searches purse because I never carry cash* Oh, I only have one penny. Here you go.

A: Thank you.

Me: Don't forget to make a wish.

A: *throws penny* I WISH, I WISH, I WISH I MIGHT, GET ANUDDER PENNY!!!

Too bad her wish didn't come true. I would have bottled that magic up and sold it on eBay!

Metformin

I've had my prescription of Metformin filled and sitting on my bathroom counter since April. I think I'm ready to start taking it, but I need some advice, first. Should I take it at night? With food? Doesn't matter? I know a lot of people get sick on it, so I'm hoping to try to avoid that as much as possible. How long does it take to start feeling the effects?

I'm on CD 61 of my 3rd cycle of the year. PCOS is annoying.

Christmas Present Ideas For The Dudes

So... what are you getting the dudes in your life for Christmas? We'll be with family celebrating so, some how a blow job just doesn't seem appropriate. Our anniversary is a week later and we'll still be with family then, too.

Birthday, Christmas, and Anniversary 9 weeks apart just doesn't seem fair when you don't plan ahead. Ha.

Shortest blog post ever? Thanks NaBloPoMo. Eight more days baby, eight more days.

Move Over Chiquita Banana

Chiquita Banana doesn't have shit on A.



The local Publix had a Chiquita Banana set up that was giving away smoothies and taking pictures of people who dared to dress up in a banana suit. We obliged, but only under one circumstance, A had to wear a pink tutu.

Cutest idea ever, right?

[This post contains no bitching or moaning. Aren't you proud?]

I Bitch and Moan Too Much

I had a comment on my last post about me bitching and moaning too much. I'm sorry some of you feel that way. My life has been crazier than normal since July. If I've been abnormally bitchy and moany since November 1st, it's all Deb's fault. I'm trying to keep up with NaBloPoMo. We're supposed to post every single day during the month of November. At the end of the day, I'm exhausted and my brain is fried, so some things I may not have blogged about before, are getting blogged about this month.

My life isn't full of roses and rainbows. I don't blog about a lot of what goes on in my life, it's too overwhelming at times. I'm busy taking care of everyone but myself. I spend several hours a day in a car dropping off, picking up, or waiting for NYEBoy or K at college. I'm going through two tanks of gas a week, if that's any indication of how much I'm in the car driving. I'm trying to keep the house livable and the family happy. More often than not, I fail at both. I barely have time to blog. I haven't been able to work on ALIGab or selling on eBay because I don't have any time after I spend hours taking care of everyone and trying to help K study and not fail school.

I'm helping an illiterate 21 year old who isn't sure from day-to-day what she wants to do with her life. I spend hours upon hours helping her study for school, only for her to turn around and fail the tests because she doesn't retain anything. She doesn't know if the studying for a degree is going to be worth it. She thinks it might be better to work at Walmart or Cracker Barrel, because Math is too hard and she doesn't know how to write a five minute speech or use a computer. All of that this thanks to the fucking fabulous parenting job my parents have done. I have to listen to her babble about how she is in love with her ex who is only talking to her for naked pictures to wank off to while he's on his way to Iraq, but she's so stupid she doesn't realize it. She thinks she loves him. I have to watch her shitty parenting skills she learned from our parents be passed down to the most amazingly sweet, spunky 3 year old. I have get threats every other week from Thugboy talking about trying to take A away from K. So much so, that I am having to miss Thanksgiving with my family this year for fear of he won't let us leave safely from TN and I can't risk K being any more distracted for her exams over the next three weeks.

Taking care of A day-to-day has opened up my 5 years-in-the-making infertility wounds. Do you know what it's like to look into this little girl's eyes and want her future to be so fucking bright because she's smart and deserves it? It reaffirms my desire to be a mother every single fucking day. We won't be able to do treatments for a few more years yet, and it sucks. It really fucking sucks.

I also have to deal with my mostly unsupportive family watching from the sidelines, just waiting for us to crumble so they can yell "I TOLD YOU SO!" I have to deal with my father, who since A was born, has called me several times a week as we try to patch up a rocky relationship, but since K has moved in here, he's been an asshole towards NYEBoy and I. He went from wanting to help us help her, to telling us to take care of them ourselves.

I'm also having to worry about my own health. My lack of periods. My body aches. My hair is balding and falling out. I lost one of my only two back bottom chewing teeth. The recovery has been rough. I'm only averaging about 3 to 4 hours of sleep every night. I'm exhausted, but hoping it'll all be worth it in the end.

I wish I could offer more roses and rainbows for you all, but at this time, A is usually my only bright side and I just don't think it's fair to blog about her constantly when I know some infertile women read this blog. She may not be my own, but she brings me more joy and happiness than those dark lonely days did. Plus, if I blog about her constantly, it'll remind me of the deep desire I have to be a mother constantly.

Yes, I bitch a lot. Yes, I moan a lot. But fuck, it is what it is. It's my life, currently. This blog is my therapy. If I can't get it out, it'll cause me to go so crazy that I might need a padded room and strong drugs.

Hasbro, YOU SUCK!

We bought A one of them there fancy flat screen Lite Brites. We were all excited about getting home to try this, but once we arrived at home we opened it up and set it up only to discover it needs BATTERIES. WTF? Since when did Lite Brites need BATTERIES? Can't you charge us $1-$2 more and include batteries?



I was hoping to enjoy the memories of my childhood through my niece, now I get to enjoy a broken-hearted-pissed-off three year old. Thanks Hasbro. THANKS A LOT!

(Please note, A was broken-hearted, but she wasn't so pissed off that it kept her up all night. We just wish we could have played with this tonight. This isn't meant to be a "real" rant on Hasbro. I just didn't think to read the box about batteries because "when I was a little girl--a few years ago!--it plugged into the wall, thus did not need batteries.)

Show & Tell: Recycling

The 3R bug has hit me again. What? You don't know what the 3R bug is? It's the Recycling, Reducing, Reusing bug!

I picked up this dirty dollhouse bookcase yesterday at a local store for $6.





After a good wash down with the steam cleaner and a new coat of white paint, A now has a beautiful dollhouse bookcase. If I could put it into the bin, I would. Instead, A will use it while she's living with us, then whenever our daughter gets here, it'll be hers.





I can already see it being put into the attic for my future grandchildren after my children have used it. And for $6 and $12 in painting supplies, it's a steal!

The Crazy Shit She Says: Smarty Pants

While I was pumping gas last week, I glanced over and noticed a girl in the backseat holding an infant who couldn't have been any more than about 7 or 8 months, out the window, so that the baby could play. They continued to do this as they drove off. WTF? I took a picture of the license plate and called the police department as soon as I got in the car. After I called, K got mad at me a bit asking why I would call the police on someone like that. I told her it was irresponsible. Children under a certain age should be IN A CAR SEAT when the car is in motion.

This is the conversation A and I had shortly after that.

A: Why did yew call da polices on dat lady?
Me: Because she was holding her baby while she was driving.
A: Maybe she just wubed her baby and wanted to gib her a hug.
Me: Maybe, but if she really loved her child she would out them in a carseat while the car was going.

Yesterday morning we had this conversation.

A: Hey, I just wanted to tell yew I called duh polices on dat lady next to us.
Me: Oh yeah? Why?
A: Because she was holden her baby in duh car wifout a carseat.
Me: That's good. It's too dangerous to drive like that huh? You're very smart.
A: *happy sigh* Yeah. I'm pretty intelligent.
Me: *laughs* Yes you are.

Two Things

1. My brother is leaving Utah tomorrow morning. He called me last week to tell me he was going to stay until he could save some money to move. Sunday he called me to tell me his girlfriend has been cheating on him. I helped him sell one of his cars. He's using the other one to attempt to drive 1600 miles to my grandmother's house. He'll come down here two or three weeks later.

2. My back left tooth is still sore. I was trying to put off going to the dentist for another check up to give it some time to heal. But, as my luck would have it, the partial root canal on the back right tooth cracked tonight. Guess who's going back to the dentist this week?

If you don't mind saying a prayer for my brother's safe travels and pray that my tooth can be saved. If I lose this tooth, I will not have any bottom back teeth to chew with.

Movie Time

We like to rent movies around this joint at least once a week. We usually use Redbox, but I've recently discovered Blockbuster Express. I have a coupon to share with you all so that you can try them out, too. Enter the promotional code GT9RB when prompted and you can rent one, get one free. It's for one rental night only. So go save yourself $40, rent two movies for $1, pop a bag of popcorn, grab a bag of candy, an ice cold coke, and your favorite warm body to snuggle up to and enjoy! Oh yeah, the coupon is good until 1/31/10.

(And for the record, I'm so fucking glad I'm half way through with NaBloPoMo. I feel like I've just rambled for 15 fucking blog post, but I can't seem to find the time to make a coherent blog post every night at 11:55.)

The Crazy Shit Some People Say

We just got home from this altercation and of course, I have to blog about it. This was between the lady behind us in line, and A and I.

Lady: You're a very pretty girl.

Me to A: Can you tell the nice lady thank you?

A: *silence*

Me: It's not nice to ignore someone when they are talking to you.

A: *silence*

Lady: Yeah, she's right. You may be pretty but you ways are very ugly.

Me: *silence*

A: *silence*

Lady: *goes to another line*

I'm torn. I'm torn because the lady was right and wrong. Yes, A should have said thank you, but it's late and she's in a foul mood. But, she's also wrong because A is three years old. You may want to say something like that out loud, but it so should have stayed in that big ass head of hers. The lady was an elderly lady so I'm sure she expected a little bit more manners out of A, but geez. I acknowledged her compliment, even if A ignored her.

What do you think? What she right? wrong? both?

Family Fun Time

We try to make an effort to spend an afternoon together once a week for a little bit of family time. My hope is that we won't fight as much and perhaps when unhappy or pissed off feelings start to arise, we'll try to work them out sooner, rather than letting them boil over. That's not to say we don't still have "WTF HAVE WE DONE?" moments, but it has made us all feel like a family a little bit more than just roommates.

Sometimes we'll grab lunch and ice cream, then head off to the park to fly kites, play at the playground, or feed the ducks. Sometimes we go bowling. Sometimes we go to the movies. Sometimes we'll rent movies or even do game night.

Yesterday and Today we headed over to The Fun Station to, well, have a little fun. We went a few months back on a day where they had free miniature golf. Last night and tonight they had other specials going on so we decided to take advantage of the deals and enjoy some family bonding.

K, A, and I all love the go-karts. I think love isn't a strong enough word to be honest. I can't wait for my brother to go with us when he gets here. NYEBoy loves the miniature golf. I think I would like the golf if A wasn't around. It's a little harder to enjoy putting with a 3 year old running amuck. They also have laser tag, but we haven't done that yet. I'll blame that on a certain 3 year old, too. We tried the bumper boats, but realized pretty quickly that we're probably a little too old (and wide!) to be bumping boats. The arcade, in a word, is awesome. Who doesn't like gold tokens, bright lights, balls, buttons, and TICKETS? Holy shit, it's addicting. In two nights (and $30 in tokens) we won about 1200-1300 tickets between all of us. A loves the prizes, too!

I had a few minor complaints on Twitter, but they went out of their way to fix them for us, which I'm very pleased with. Great customer service will keep people coming back. Family night is fun. We'll defiantly have to start going to The Fun Station more often.

Signs

Do you believe in signs? I do. I try to look for signs everywhere butterflies or ladybugs or whatever, but I haven't really had any that made me stop in my tracks like I did this morning. I opened the door as I was leaving to take the crew to school, when I looked down and noticed this smack in the center of my doorway.




I would like to think it was a sign from someone. God? Maddie? My highschool friend that died 8 years ago yesterday? All of the above? Some of the above? None of the above?

I'll probably never know, but I decided to bend down and pick it up anyway. I'm saving it. I'll frame it one of these days.

Show & Tell: Maddie Turns 2

Madeline passed away several months ago, but today she turned two. Her sweet big smile is truly missed. I would like to take a moment and ask you to donate to Friends of Maddie in her honor for her second birthday. I know it's close to the holidays, but even $2 for her 2nd birthday will help.



I sang Happy Birthday, made a wish, and blew out the candle for you, Maddie.



Don't forget to go see what the rest of the class is sharing.

The Crazy Shit She Says: Forgiveness

This was a conversation between K and A.

K: You should be a good girl.

A: I don't hab to be dough.

K: Excuse me? Why not?

A: Becuz in da bible Je-zuhz says he wheel forgibe me no madder what, even when I'm bad. So I don't hab to be a good girl. I can be bad, too.

Preach on sister, preach on.

Update on Tooth

I know you're all just dying to know an update on how my mouth is doing, so I'm happily obliging. (If you're not, just play along!)

I am happy to report that I am on my second day of NO pain medication! That's a fair cry from shooting up Tylenol 3 every six hours. The hole is closing up, but is still pretty sore when you touch it. The bone appears to be coming out more than being covered up by the gums, but she told me it would take a few weeks for that to happen. I guess I'll just be patient.

Now comes the real hard part. The part where I schedule an appointment to have the tooth on the right side fixed before it gets as bad as the left one did. You know, like willingly go to the dentist. Who does that shit? Not me. But, I guess I better.

Our Newest Arrival

I am pleased to announce the arrival of our newest addition to the family...





This is Lingo Lassin.  Daughter to A.

Mother and daughter are (thankfully) sleeping peacefully right now.

No, I can't believe it either. My niece is a mother before me! *sob* I guess it's time to break down and get a reborn!

Reconnect

NYEBoy and I really need to spend some time together alone. We need time to reconnect. Shortly after the girls moved in with us, we felt abnormally giddy about each other. We were snuggling in bed every night, having sex almost every night, and really feeling great about things. It was like the beginning of our relationship. You know, when you just can't get enough of each other. The more you get, the more you want.

Some where along the way, life began getting a little crazy and stressed out. Instead of spending time together cuddling at night, I was staying up helping K study for school. Instead of having sex every night, I was staying up helping K study for school. Instead of feeling great about things, we were hardly talking since we didn't spend much time together at night, awake.

As soon as K's exams are done, we will be meeting my Mom halfway to drop off the girls. This will give us about three weeks to spend alone, together. Three weeks to feel giddy, snuggle, and have lots of sex. A few days before Christmas, we'll head back home to spend time with the family for about 10 days. Then, all four of us will get in the car and head back to Flo.rida to prepare for a new year, a new semester, and our new normal.

Upcycling

I'm sure we all remember in grade school learning about reusing, reducing, and recycling. But, it's 2009 folks. It's time to upcycle. It's better than recycling. It's turning trash into a higher quality product. Something you would use instead of said object.

I took an old book and lamp cord and turned it into a whole new look. I cheated a bit and bought a new lamp shade, though. You can blame this on Deb, too. I didn't have enough time before the end of today to shop for a used lamp shade to match.



Are you looking for a unique gift to give someone this Christmas? Someone who likes books, but wouldn't frown on me for ruining a book to make a lamp out of it? Drop me an e-mail with your zip code and I will give you an estimate.

It's chic. It's hip. It's upcycled. And you know you want it.

Why I Shouldn't Be Doing NaBloPoMo

So, I'm really, really trying to keep up with NaBloPoMo. It's all Deb's fault. She told me to make NaBloPoMo my bitch. Like a hooker on the corner listening to her pimp, I took the orders and now I'm laying in bed wondering why the fuck I agreed to this shit? Oh, that's right, for my cut of the deal bragging rights.

When I decided to be a good little prostitute blogger, I didn't really think I would still be dealing with my tooth extraction. And it wasn't from a blow job. How cool would that blog post be? But, I am. I've been to the dentist three times in the past week. When I left the office this afternoon, she told me to feel free to come back in tomorrow for another wash out and packing if I'm still in a lot of pain. The numbing thing she packs it with, is the most vile shit you've ever tasted. Just ask K, she smelled the stench from my mouth when I tried to mumble.

Sometimes the pain feels like I'm chewing on razor blades or someone is ripping the gums around the bone. Other times, the pain is a throb. It sucks ass.

So, excuse the lack of real blogging, but I hope you'll consider this picture a homework pass. Deal?





DO NOT SCROLL DOWN IF YOU'RE NOT SQUEAMISH!



I MEAN IT!

Show & Tell: Funny Websites

It's been a rough week over here at casa de InDueTime. This week, I decided to try to make you laugh. Have you ever been to PeopleofWalmart.com? No? Well, you should. No, really. I insist. Go ahead, come back, but only after you've seen every picture on the site.

Hey, what are you still doing here? Don't you want to see this?




or this?

The Crazy Shit She (We) Says: Clean Up

A conversation between A and I in the car.

Me: Do you know who our President is?

A: Obama

Me: Good. Do you know his first name?

A: No. Whud iz it?

Me: It's President Barack Obama. Can you say Barack Obama?

A: Barack Obama!

Me: Do you know who our Vice President is?

A: No. Whutz dat?

Me: His name is Joe Biden. If his name was Dick Cheney he would think his job WAS President of the United States, but really, he's just kind of like his helper.

A: Oh. Yeah, Ifb I wuz President I would need a helper too. He's got a lot to clean up.

Me: You've got that right sweetheart.

A: And den I'd pway (play) outside.

Me: But then your name would be Bush.

Little Mouth, Big Fingers

A "side effect", if you will, of having "IT" is also having a small mouth. That explains why for all of these years, the dentist yell at me for not opening my mouth wide enough, despite me saying I CAN'T! I have an abnormally small mouth, which I completely make up for with cussing. Maybe it's little man syndrome of the mouth.

Growing up, we didn't go to the dentist much before or during my parents divorce. I think I can only recall going once and it was only because of a really bad cavity. It wasn't until my early teenage years that my father finally started taking us to the dentist and orthodontist. Even in the beginning, My dad was always sending us to adult dentist. After throwing up in a dentist face, my father finally agreed to send me to a pediatric dentist.

During my teenage years, I had several teeth removed, several cavities filled, braces, and a retainer to boot. It was a traumatic experience. My mouth is small and these dentist didn't give a shit. Once my dad kicked me off his insurance, I wasn't able to afford dental insurance or care again for about four or five years. Even then, I only went to the dentist two or three times. Just long enough to get temporary work done to get the pain to go away. I had too much anxiety and never went back.

That was in 2007. Earlier this year I had a tooth abscess in one of the teeth they did a partial root canal in. I was supposed to return to complete it, but obviously never did. I swore I would find the time to get the tooth taken care of, once and for all. But, I didn't. Several months later, it happened again. Another abscess, same tooth. This was it. I had to make time to get the tooth fixed. But, I didn't. And one day last week while I was eating pizza, the tooth said enough is enough. All of it cracked except a tiny piece.

I had no choice. NYEBoy made me an appointment to see someone. I was embarrassed to see a dentist with my mouth in the condition it was/is in. What responsible adult let's their teeth get the way mine was/is? I did, of course.

I had a lot of anxiety about seeing this dentist. Where their hands going to be big? Am I going to start sweating and pass out? No, really, am I? Would I cry? While I was going through the medical history things like "Do you have anxiety? Have you had a heart attack?" My answer was "Only at the dentist." I can do this. I have to do this. I have no choice. Suck it up, bitch. Oh! My name just got called! I told The Crew to sell my inventory and split up my computers and the amount they got from the inventory selling if I didn't come out alive.

After getting an xray and explaining to the assistant that I needed a smaller xray piece because of a small mouth from a chromosome disorder, I finally got the first part out of the way. And there part of it is...



As soon as the dentist walked in, I immediately felt the need to explain why my mouth was in such disarray. Bad childhood memories, no insurance, insurance, anxiety, and back to no insurance with more anxiety thrown in for happy hour. After one look of the xray it was clear I wasn't going to get out of there without an extraction. She told me not to worry. She was going to help me.

Five (or six?) shots, lots of blood, tons of pressure, popping, prodding, about 1,000 atta girl's, and about an hour or so later, I was done. Gauze on tooth to stop bleeding, an instruction packet in hand, and a WHY THE FUCK DID YOU MAKE ME DO THIS glare to NYEBoy, and I was walking out of the door with a follow up appointment in a week.

The pain sucked. I've had several teeth SURGICALLY removed, at one time, and it didn't hurt this bad. Tylenol 3 makes me feel like I'm walking on clouds and makes me fall asleep, but it helps with the pain. I don't like taking pain pills, but I finally had to after I was in bed crying to my mom telling her it hurt so bad.

Over the weekend, I noticed a piece of tooth scraping my tongue. I decided to go back in this morning to have them look at it. Without a wince, the dude started trying to remove it. Sans pain meds. NOTHING! He was wiggling, pulling, and breaking shit in there with no warning. It hurt so bad. He filed down what was left and told me to come back on Thursday for the follow up.

I'm still in quite a bit of pain, so I'm not sure if it's from a dry socket or if there's actually a big piece of tooth still in there, like I think I'm feeling. I don't think I can wait until Thursday for the follow up. I just need to decide if I'm going to be a pussy and walk in again or call them crying. I can't be doped up on pain pills while driving to drop off and pick up the crew, especially with a 3 year old in tow and in my care, alone, when we get home.

Dental work sucks. The bill sucked, too.

Hopefully, I'll get this tooth pain worked out soon enough. I can't stand it.

A Rock'n Halloween

In 2006, A and I didn't go trick or treating, we just attended a friend's sons party. She wore orange leggings and a pumpkin shirt. In 2007, A was a can of raid and I was a spider. In 2008, A was an Obama supporter to piss off my Republican Mom.

This year, the kid had a little say. She wanted to be " a rockstar, yike Hannah Montana". I don't personally care for Hannah Montana, though. So, we settled on a rockstar!



We got a lot of compliments. Everyone pretty much knew who/what she was. AND she didn't even have to look like a slutty Hannah Montana! Heh. We met up with @kristencmcd since this was out first year trick-or-treating in Talla.hassee. We even stayed a bit longer than they did because A wasn't quite ready to go home yet.

With the exception of the guitar and light up sticks, the whole outfit can and will be used day-to-day. I can pair it up with a neon colored long sleeved shirt on colder days, too.

My only complaint for the evening, wait, there was two. The first complaint for the evening was the slutty dressed 13 year olds. WTF? Why do the parents let their BABY GIRLS walk out of the house looking like a WHORE? Yeah. I said it. WTF is wrong with people?

My other complaint was that A bit the shit out of my chest during dinner. We were playing, then my phone fell on the ground. When I leaned down to pick the phone up, the little shit took a bite out of my chest. I have a nice 1 inch round mark on my boob. It looks like a hicky almost. She broke the skin, too. :-(