I'm thankful for my considerate friend who called me to tell me I needed to make plans to come in town in April. When I question 'Why April', she reminded me that was when her baby was due. Ohhh yeah. Silly me. I forgot she called me a few weeks ago to ask if there was a paternity test you could do during pregnancy, because she was pregnant. But, she didn't know if the dad was a married cop or her ex-boyfriend, because they had sex three days a part.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope yours' was as good as mine.
Thursday, November 27
Tuesday, November 25
See You On The Flip Side!
We're going home tonight at midnight. We have to stop in NYEBoy's hometown first, so our trip may actually turn into a 15 hour trip. Sigh. We should be back in Memphis around 3-4 at the latest, I hope!
Wish us luck.
Wish us luck.
Monday, November 24
Skype, Oh How I Heart The
While I was trying to get A to go to sleep last night, as an hour had passed, a light bulb went off in my head. Skype! Oh, Skype! I logged into my Skype account and set the laptop on top of the TV facing her and turned the screen light off. I could watch her in bed while I worked in my office. Can you say SUH-WEET! Who CARES if she stayed awake the entire four hours, I worked for four hours! It sucks I just figured this out two days before we are taking her back. Damn it. She's laying down right now for her nap, watching BobBob (SpongeBob), while I work blog.
Oh yeah, none of that stuff on the list has been done yet. Did I mention I only have two days before we leave? Fuck.
Oh yeah, none of that stuff on the list has been done yet. Did I mention I only have two days before we leave? Fuck.
Saturday, November 22
Before & After A Vacation
Why is it that the days leading up to a vacation are so crazy? Are you like me and have to have the entire house spotless before you can leave? We still aren't sure when we are going to get to head back, either Tuesday or Wednesday, though. I'm praying for Tuesday, because I would really like for my family to see A before I have to take her back home, but if we don't arrive until Thanksgiving morning we have to take her straight to K and Thugboy.
I have a few loads of laundry to wash, plus the bed sheets. The living room needs to be dusted, vacuumed, and picked up. I need to wash, dry, and put away all dishes and pots and pans. My fridge needs to be cleaned out. Both bathrooms need to be scrubbed. I need to sweep and mop the downstairs floors. The bedroom needs to be picked up. I would love to have my office organized before we leave, but with a two year old, I'm not counting on it. I also need to wash and vacuum the car. I also need to reposition A's seatbelt in her car seat and wash the cover. I also need to pack up all her belongings to take back home to Memphis. Oh, and I need to put our Christmas decorations up.
The part that sucks is taking the drive. And, we're coming back to Tallahassee Saturday. Can we say, e-x-h-a-u-s-t-e-d?
I have a few loads of laundry to wash, plus the bed sheets. The living room needs to be dusted, vacuumed, and picked up. I need to wash, dry, and put away all dishes and pots and pans. My fridge needs to be cleaned out. Both bathrooms need to be scrubbed. I need to sweep and mop the downstairs floors. The bedroom needs to be picked up. I would love to have my office organized before we leave, but with a two year old, I'm not counting on it. I also need to wash and vacuum the car. I also need to reposition A's seatbelt in her car seat and wash the cover. I also need to pack up all her belongings to take back home to Memphis. Oh, and I need to put our Christmas decorations up.
The part that sucks is taking the drive. And, we're coming back to Tallahassee Saturday. Can we say, e-x-h-a-u-s-t-e-d?
Friday, November 21
Infertile's Favorite Time of Year
As the winter Holidays are upon us, it's another unfriendly reminder for an infertile. It can be a fragile time. I've had vision of announcing our pregnancy at Thanksgiving and Christmas. You know, when you're at the dinner table and giving thanks, I always imagine I can say, "I'm thankful to finally be pregnant, SURPRISE!" Or better yet, during our Christmas day present exchange, making everyone open a present from us, nestled inside would be our ultrasound picture.
Our first Christmas after M and I began trying, my cousin who is six months older than me, announced her pregnancy. The next Christmas, our second while trying, we found out my teenage sister was pregnant and there was a 6 month old baby. The next year, there was a 1 year old and A was six months old. Last year, we had a 2 yr old and 1 yr old A. This year, NYEBoy and I are going to my uncles house (three hours away) and no babies will be there. Although I wish A was going to be with us, it will be nice not dealing with anyone else younger than 14.
In some ways, since the arrival of A, I have become less of a bitter infertile, but in other ways, it's still as raw as ever. Every year I hope and pray for us to be able to announce our pregnancy or to have a tiny bundle with us, but without fail, it's never happened.
I don't want to say I've given up hope, but it's becoming increasingly harder to envision the Thanksgiving or Christmas I've always wanted. But with NYEBoy by my side, I know I'll make it.
Our first Christmas after M and I began trying, my cousin who is six months older than me, announced her pregnancy. The next Christmas, our second while trying, we found out my teenage sister was pregnant and there was a 6 month old baby. The next year, there was a 1 year old and A was six months old. Last year, we had a 2 yr old and 1 yr old A. This year, NYEBoy and I are going to my uncles house (three hours away) and no babies will be there. Although I wish A was going to be with us, it will be nice not dealing with anyone else younger than 14.
In some ways, since the arrival of A, I have become less of a bitter infertile, but in other ways, it's still as raw as ever. Every year I hope and pray for us to be able to announce our pregnancy or to have a tiny bundle with us, but without fail, it's never happened.
I don't want to say I've given up hope, but it's becoming increasingly harder to envision the Thanksgiving or Christmas I've always wanted. But with NYEBoy by my side, I know I'll make it.
Thursday, November 20
Migraines
Does anyone know why I get a migraine around the 11-12th day of my cycle? It leaves me dry-heaving and wanting to rock in the fetal position. Three Advil and a few hours later, I feel fine again.
HELLLLLLLLLLLL-O body, could you please be a little normal? Just a litte!
HELLLLLLLLLLLL-O body, could you please be a little normal? Just a litte!
Wednesday, November 19
Our First Big Fight
Last night we had our first big fight, hence the lack of post. A few weeks ago I asked if I could switch my office and the bedroom because the bedroom is twice the space of my office and I am over run with inventory. It's taking up space in my office, hallway, bedroom, and living room. If I switched rooms, it would all fit in one room, and my house would feel like a home, not a storage facility.
NYEBoy reluctantly said "okay", but changed his mind after I switched everything except the desk. I was pissed. His reasoning behind it, to me, is fucking ridiculous. There is plenty of room in the office room for a bed and TV, plus it has two closets. It basically came down to his OCD. Whatever, our house will continue to look like a damn storage facility, but his OCD will surely have the bed where he wants it.
I was, and still am, very pissed off about it.
NYEBoy reluctantly said "okay", but changed his mind after I switched everything except the desk. I was pissed. His reasoning behind it, to me, is fucking ridiculous. There is plenty of room in the office room for a bed and TV, plus it has two closets. It basically came down to his OCD. Whatever, our house will continue to look like a damn storage facility, but his OCD will surely have the bed where he wants it.
I was, and still am, very pissed off about it.
Monday, November 17
The Only Thing
The only thing I miss about working outside of the home, and I mean the only thing, is the steady paychecks. Since I've had A here with us for two weeks I haven't been able to work as much as I want/need to, which means my bank account is the lowest it's been in years. As much as I appreciate NYEBoy holding down the financial fort in this household, it still sucks not being able to walk into a store to buy anything I want.
Speaking of which, the lil' monster is on my lap eating my entire stash of mini m&ms because it was the only way I could get her to quit crying long enough for me to finish this post.
I'm off to pour me an ice cold coke.
I surrender. She won, as she does every night about this time.
Speaking of which, the lil' monster is on my lap eating my entire stash of mini m&ms because it was the only way I could get her to quit crying long enough for me to finish this post.
I'm off to pour me an ice cold coke.
I surrender. She won, as she does every night about this time.
Sunday, November 16
Show & Tell - THE Picture
We've all got one. You know, that picture, the one where we wish we could go back in time and strangle our parents. Well, A finally has one. This is what happens when you straighten a biracial child's hair and then don't give her a bath within 24 hours.
Do you think she'll ever forgive me?
Saturday, November 15
2yr Olds Aren't For Pussies
What happened to my sweet little loving baby girl? She has been replaced with a demon straight from the depths of hell. No, I'm seriously! I tried for an hour to get her to take a nap, but gave up. She only had a few melt downs until about 5:30pm. Then all hell broke loose.
She was throwing books down the balcony and/or stairs. She was sticking things up her nose, then crying because they wouldn't come out. Then she started trying on clothes, but couldn't get in or out of them. She was knocking over make up, hairbrushes, a blow dryer, or anything else that wasn't nailed down. NYEBoy left the house because of her screaming and acting a damn fool.
Finally, at 6:30 I couldn't take it any more. I made her a sippy cup of milk, put a biaper on her ass, and laid her down. She was out by 6:55.
Please remind me in the morning when she wakes up before the sun, that I was a pussy and couldn't handle the pressure tonight and laid her down at 6:30.
She was throwing books down the balcony and/or stairs. She was sticking things up her nose, then crying because they wouldn't come out. Then she started trying on clothes, but couldn't get in or out of them. She was knocking over make up, hairbrushes, a blow dryer, or anything else that wasn't nailed down. NYEBoy left the house because of her screaming and acting a damn fool.
Finally, at 6:30 I couldn't take it any more. I made her a sippy cup of milk, put a biaper on her ass, and laid her down. She was out by 6:55.
Please remind me in the morning when she wakes up before the sun, that I was a pussy and couldn't handle the pressure tonight and laid her down at 6:30.
Friday, November 14
God Is Mad At You, But Grandma Is Pissed Off At Me
A has been hell on wheels this week when it comes to bedtime. It has taken any where from 20 minutes (with no nap all day!) to almost four hours. Tonight, it was closer to four hours. I was tired of screaming at her, so tonight I vowed not to scream at bedtime.
As we were laying down, well over the three hour mark later, it started raining.
*THUNDER!*
A: What dat outside?
Me: God
A: God?
Me: Yep, he's mad at you for not going to sleep.
Hey, at least I didn't yell. I'm so going to be a great Mom one day, you betcha!
I straightened her hair tonight. I can't wait to send this picture to my mom. She's going to be pissed off. Not because she looks so fucking cute, but because she doesn't want me using a chi on her hair at two years old. Sorry Mom!
As we were laying down, well over the three hour mark later, it started raining.
*THUNDER!*
A: What dat outside?
Me: God
A: God?
Me: Yep, he's mad at you for not going to sleep.
Hey, at least I didn't yell. I'm so going to be a great Mom one day, you betcha!
I straightened her hair tonight. I can't wait to send this picture to my mom. She's going to be pissed off. Not because she looks so fucking cute, but because she doesn't want me using a chi on her hair at two years old. Sorry Mom!
Thursday, November 13
Sweet & Savory!
Despite my ever expanding ass and double chin, I've found two new fabulous foods.
First up is Pringles Restaurant Cravers. We bought the Onion Blossom and Cheesy Fries. Although the Cheesy Fries are okay, they weren't what I was hoping for. However, the Onion Blossom is totally fucking to die for. Seriously. I looked on their site, but didn't find any information on this line, but after doing some googling I found out they make other flavors such as, Cheeseburger, Mexican Layered Dip, Mozzarella Sticks with Marinara, and Slow Cooked BBQ. I think I might die and go to fat girl heaven, or maybe not.
My sweet addiction is now the Oreo's limited edition Peppermint Candy Creme Oreos. They taste just like a thin mint. I have ate an entire bag this week. In fact, I am using these Oreos instead of the regular ones to make my Oreo Truffle Balls this year. Can you imagine little white balls with red and green drizzles? Oh my...
If you see me walking out of Wal-mart with a cart full of Pringles and Oreos, please don't tell my Mom. Oh, and I promise I won't tell anyone if after reading this you run to your Wal-mart to get some, too. *wink* *wink*
Warning: I am not held liable for your expanding ass or chin after you become addicted. After all, I said fabulous, not healthy.
First up is Pringles Restaurant Cravers. We bought the Onion Blossom and Cheesy Fries. Although the Cheesy Fries are okay, they weren't what I was hoping for. However, the Onion Blossom is totally fucking to die for. Seriously. I looked on their site, but didn't find any information on this line, but after doing some googling I found out they make other flavors such as, Cheeseburger, Mexican Layered Dip, Mozzarella Sticks with Marinara, and Slow Cooked BBQ. I think I might die and go to fat girl heaven, or maybe not.
My sweet addiction is now the Oreo's limited edition Peppermint Candy Creme Oreos. They taste just like a thin mint. I have ate an entire bag this week. In fact, I am using these Oreos instead of the regular ones to make my Oreo Truffle Balls this year. Can you imagine little white balls with red and green drizzles? Oh my...
If you see me walking out of Wal-mart with a cart full of Pringles and Oreos, please don't tell my Mom. Oh, and I promise I won't tell anyone if after reading this you run to your Wal-mart to get some, too. *wink* *wink*
Warning: I am not held liable for your expanding ass or chin after you become addicted. After all, I said fabulous, not healthy.
Wednesday, November 12
Cycle 34
In three years, three months, one week, and five days, I've only had 34 cycles.
Nothing like walking around a lake with a two year old and period cramps.
So much for a thankful Thanksgiving.
Assholes.
Nothing like walking around a lake with a two year old and period cramps.
So much for a thankful Thanksgiving.
Assholes.
Tuesday, November 11
Potty Training Woes
Potty training A was not a hassle at all. We rarely have any accidents. I still put her in a diaper at night, but so far it's been dry every morning.
However, this child pees entirely too much. I know she drinks a lot, which is the cause, but my goodness! Public restrooms are hard enough to maneuver around trying to get a child not to touch anything and now you're asking me to take this toilet seat hugger into one, whenever she needs? You're kidding, right?
I cheat and put a diaper on her when I know there might be a chance she will have to go while we are out. But, she won't go quietly. It usually goes something like this...
A: I GOTTA GO PEE!
Me: You have a diaper on, go.
A: I CAN PEE IN MY BIAPER?
Me: Shhhh, yes, it's our secret. You can pee in your biaper.
A: Okay.
*Jeopardy theme song*
A: I PEED IN MY BIAPER! I A BIG GIRL, HUH?
Me: Yes sweetheart, you sure are!
Who knew a potty trained child could be such a hassle.
However, this child pees entirely too much. I know she drinks a lot, which is the cause, but my goodness! Public restrooms are hard enough to maneuver around trying to get a child not to touch anything and now you're asking me to take this toilet seat hugger into one, whenever she needs? You're kidding, right?
I cheat and put a diaper on her when I know there might be a chance she will have to go while we are out. But, she won't go quietly. It usually goes something like this...
A: I GOTTA GO PEE!
Me: You have a diaper on, go.
A: I CAN PEE IN MY BIAPER?
Me: Shhhh, yes, it's our secret. You can pee in your biaper.
A: Okay.
*Jeopardy theme song*
A: I PEED IN MY BIAPER! I A BIG GIRL, HUH?
Me: Yes sweetheart, you sure are!
Who knew a potty trained child could be such a hassle.
Monday, November 10
Death
So, although death wasn't one of the things I mentioned the other day, I feel like I need to blog about it. I thought if I blogged about it, it might ease my mind. Hopefully.
A few weeks ago, I thought about death for some reason and it's scared the hell out of me. I am really afraid of dying. I believe in God, but I have never attended church regularly, so that's probably part of my problem. Or maybe I need to see a shrink, who knows.
I wonder what's going to happen to me when I die, what it's going to feel like. Will it be like being in the dark, just talking to myself, forever? Am I going to Hell? Will it be hot? What is hell like? Is hell full of devils and demons to scare you for eternity? Am I going to Heaven? What is heaven like? Will everything be made of gold and candy?
Then I get into the whole thought about when am I going to die? Will I be 100? If so, I have already lived 1/4 the way through my life, I'm only 3/4 the way there. If I don't live until 100, then I've already lived more than that.
Which leads me to, what will my mark on this world be? What will I have done on this planet to deserve to go to Heaven? If I died tomorrow, I would be dying an infertile 24 year old who really hasn't done too much for the world. That scares me.
Yeah, go ahead, tell me, I already know it! I'm crazy. I've lost it.
A few weeks ago, I thought about death for some reason and it's scared the hell out of me. I am really afraid of dying. I believe in God, but I have never attended church regularly, so that's probably part of my problem. Or maybe I need to see a shrink, who knows.
I wonder what's going to happen to me when I die, what it's going to feel like. Will it be like being in the dark, just talking to myself, forever? Am I going to Hell? Will it be hot? What is hell like? Is hell full of devils and demons to scare you for eternity? Am I going to Heaven? What is heaven like? Will everything be made of gold and candy?
Then I get into the whole thought about when am I going to die? Will I be 100? If so, I have already lived 1/4 the way through my life, I'm only 3/4 the way there. If I don't live until 100, then I've already lived more than that.
Which leads me to, what will my mark on this world be? What will I have done on this planet to deserve to go to Heaven? If I died tomorrow, I would be dying an infertile 24 year old who really hasn't done too much for the world. That scares me.
Yeah, go ahead, tell me, I already know it! I'm crazy. I've lost it.
Sunday, November 9
Robbed
I just got off the phone with my Mom. Her house was robbed this morning while Thugboy was taking my sister to work. The only thing that had been taken was some jewelry of my sisters and 7 watches of Thugboy's that he has been buying to take to Atlanta with him when he goes to record his music "next week".
My sister called the police to file a report and when they showed up they noticed some weed sprinkles on a counter. He questioned Thugboy about it, but they didn't have enough to arrest his stupid ass.
I really wish I didn't have to bring A back in two weeks. Why was she born to those dumbasses? How am I not a better parent? I asked her if she was ready to go back home to see mommy and daddy yet, she said "No, I stay here"!
Sigh.
My sister called the police to file a report and when they showed up they noticed some weed sprinkles on a counter. He questioned Thugboy about it, but they didn't have enough to arrest his stupid ass.
I really wish I didn't have to bring A back in two weeks. Why was she born to those dumbasses? How am I not a better parent? I asked her if she was ready to go back home to see mommy and daddy yet, she said "No, I stay here"!
Sigh.
Thursday, November 6
Around Here Somewhere...
I'm here, some where. I have a lot I want to blog about.
Like the debate I had with my Mom and Grandma that left one of them not talking to me for the rest of the night (and it wasn't who you thought!).
Or my reaction to Republicans on Election Day.
Or how I can't keep my house cleaned no matter how hard I try.
Or how much sleep two adults and a toddler can get in a queen size bed with seven pillows and three blankets.
Or how I haven't got any work done since I left to go back home.
Or how my halloween decorations are still up.
Or how much I almost A was still in diapers.
Or what a feeling it is to take A in the stroller around the lake, every day so far!
Or how I had an idea about something, but was denied, which has left me feeling a little bitter.
Or how I haven't seen my debit card since, oh, some where around 550 miles ago.
Or... well, you get the idea. A is sleeping peacefully, NYEBoy is downstairs watching TV, and I am getting ready to clean up my kitchen and living room so I can go to bed and start the madness all over again tomorrow. Thankfully tomorrow is Friday, which is one of NYEBoy's longer days at school, which means I might be able to get a little bit of cleaning up done tomorrow.
Like the debate I had with my Mom and Grandma that left one of them not talking to me for the rest of the night (and it wasn't who you thought!).
Or my reaction to Republicans on Election Day.
Or how I can't keep my house cleaned no matter how hard I try.
Or how much sleep two adults and a toddler can get in a queen size bed with seven pillows and three blankets.
Or how I haven't got any work done since I left to go back home.
Or how my halloween decorations are still up.
Or how much I almost A was still in diapers.
Or what a feeling it is to take A in the stroller around the lake, every day so far!
Or how I had an idea about something, but was denied, which has left me feeling a little bitter.
Or how I haven't seen my debit card since, oh, some where around 550 miles ago.
Or... well, you get the idea. A is sleeping peacefully, NYEBoy is downstairs watching TV, and I am getting ready to clean up my kitchen and living room so I can go to bed and start the madness all over again tomorrow. Thankfully tomorrow is Friday, which is one of NYEBoy's longer days at school, which means I might be able to get a little bit of cleaning up done tomorrow.
Wednesday, November 5
We're In Florida
I cleaned my house before I left. I told NYEBoy to do two things while I was gone. Put the dishes in the dish washer and take the trash out. Instead my sink is filled with dishes and the trash hasn't been taken out, either.
So, I'm spending my morning cleaning up with a rowdy two year old. I'm going to take her to the lake at some point today. I also need to work on getting some things done for work. I also need to go to the store for groceries.
So, I'm spending my morning cleaning up with a rowdy two year old. I'm going to take her to the lake at some point today. I also need to work on getting some things done for work. I also need to go to the store for groceries.
Monday, November 3
Don't Forget To Vote!
Like the title says, don't forget to vote!
Tuesday, November 4th, 2008!
I'll be on my way back to Florida. Pray that I survive the trip with my little supporter! It will be a 10-12 hour drive. I can't wait to get back to NYEBoy.
Her outfit turned out really cute, huh? Some people liked it and a few didn't. Ha!
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