Sunday, September 30

Happy 1/2 Birthday To Me..

Today marks my half birthday. Only 6 more months til the next one!

I'm a nerd like that. >:-)

Did you know if you sleep all day, you will stay up all night? I couldn't fall asleep until around 6am this morning. Ugh!

I Stayed Home..

I had to stop in and let everyone know, for the record, I stayed at home tonight. It wasn't by choice, either! :-(

I slept most of the day, only waking for breakfast. Hmpf.

It looks like I am headed back to bed now, talk to you all later!

Friday, September 28

Doctors Verdict Is In..

I came in today with my man voice still, so they did a chest xray since it's been three weeks since the first one.

I have pneumonia. Lovely.

I knew I was sick. I got two shots in the ass, more antibiotics, more cough meds, another pill (can't think of it at the moment), and was told to go home and NO going out this weekend. Fuck.

I can't even play tennis and I just bought rackets last night to play with my BFF Mel. This sucks. I feel really well all things considered. I am a little tired, as I always am towards the end of the week, but I feel okay. The only sign of me being sick is my voice and the cough attacks. I can't breathe very well laying down, talking loud, laughing, or doing too much too fast.

I know this sounds horrible, but I had a guy friend ask me and Mel out tomorrow night and we really want to go since he won't be home for the next few weeks, and I am seriously considering resting up until tomorrow night, going out, then starting my meds Sunday. I know that sounds bad and my doctors would kill me if they even knew I was *thinking* about it. But I just can't help it! I know I should be careful before I end up in the hospital though. Sigh.

Thursday, September 27

And You Wonder...

why I don't update often?

It's probably because it's the same fucking bullshit.

Damn it! I am getting even sicker. My white count is back up again, I am pissed. I sound like shit, coughing constantly. I look like shit, too.


Sigh.

What's the next step after three rounds of antibiotics and the other shit? Steriods, probably.

Sunday, September 23

I Did It Again...

I really didn't mean to let another week pass by, sorry.

As the same with the past three weeks, I am still battling my cold. I was put on my third set of antibiotics and three other medications, including an inhaler. However, since Friday I have been battling wheezing pretty bad. I think I may need a breathing treatment, but we will see what the doc says, I'm sure she will be thrilled. I can keep the cough attacks under control if I don't talk too much or start laughing, how fun is that?

I realized this last week that it has been since July since I had a cycle. I almost tested but didn't want to have to laugh out loud. It's only been about 60 days. I'll get worried around Thanksgiving.

M and I are doing okay, we had a fight the other night, stupid reasons, all his fault. Sigh. Tomorrow we are going on a date. He has to learn to control his anger. He also needs to learn to talk about things before he gets to the point of being angry. Only three more months, I'm really trying to give him an honest chance. We shall see.

I went out again, last night. It was awesome. Probably the second best night of fun we have had in the past few months. My brother even met up with us. We got home around 5:30 and I cooked pancakes, eggs, bacon, and toast. We all passed out around 6:30 and woke up at noon. I think we are taking a break next Saturday night though, smile.

Hope you all have a wonderful week, I will post again this week, I promise!

Monday, September 17

I Don't Know What To Say

Before I update my page I need to send a huge shout out to Krystle, Thank you from the bottom of my heart for nominating me for the Nice Matters Award. It means a lot to know that my babbling words are being read.
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Since M and I have seperated, then got back together, I don't really know what to say about the whole infertility thing. Even though we haven't started treatments yet, we are sorta on a hold right now. Not preventing, but not BDing on XYZ days etc. My girlfriend asked me today if I was going back to the doctor soon to get the prescription for cl0mid, I told her the truth, no. I can't do it.

I am still hurting inside from the month of our seperation to want to go back to the doctor. I find myself snapping at him about things just to be a bitch because I am still hurt about things. Just because I agreed to give him another, his last, chance I am not over the things that were said and done by him.

Despite being preoccupied by moving and being sick, I have been trying to go out with the girls as often as I can. I went out last night and had fun. My legs hurt today, I didn't wake up until 12, and then I took a nap from 5-9. Now it's 11:30 and I am wide awake and I have to work in the morning. But I am okay with that, because I got out.

I need to get back to posting every day, or at least almost every day. It helps me to get my thoughts out on the screen.

I leave you with a picture of me and my gal pals from last night after a few drinks, but before a lot more than that!

Tuesday, September 11

Sick of Being Sick

I started feeling slightly better until I woke up this morning. I could feel myself getting worse again. I had my blood drawn again today and sure enough, my white count is elevated--again. It made my doctor mumble a few f words and ask why my body has to attract every single bad thing out there. I just nodded in agreement and got another shot in my ass, left cheek this time, for the third time in a week. I also got a different antiboitic, another decongestant, and still continuing my best friend, @dvil liquid ge|s for the headaches from coughing. Which by the way, I got nothing for the cough. If I take something for the cough, the mucus will stay in my chest and I could end up in the hospital, so I am supose to "hack it up" or at least cough my fucking brains out of my throat/nostrils! I can't talk too much or laugh because I really get out of breath and can't control the coughing.

And worst of all, I was told not to go out again this weekend--second weekend in a row, what the fuck?

I think I am sneeking out tomorrow night for college night at a local bar, fuck it!

Friday, September 7

MOVING!

Alright, boxes are being packed still. We will get the moving truck in the morning. Internet should be back by Monday!? See you then!

Wednesday, September 5

Four Months, Sir.

So, after talking with my girlfriend Mel, she said she wouldn't be ready until the beginning of the new year. I decided to sit down and talk to M about his question and propsal to move with him.

We dicussed the things he needed to work on and he agreed he was willing to make a real effort to change. We will have a date night once a week, probably on one of his nights off. I will still go out, probably once every other weekend. I am giving him until the new year to make an honest effort in changing. If not, come the new year, this hot chic is roll bouncing.

Both of our families think it's the best solution because they hate to see us just end on such a sour note. Most of my friends however, wish I would just stay away from him. *Smile*

The good thing about me moving to the apartment with him is I am now only 10 mins away from Mel, but I am 30 mins away from work. Fuck.

So I will probably be offline until maybe Monday. The phone company said they couldn't switch services until then, and they may consider it sooner. Whatever!

*On a side note:*
I had to take my grandma in to the doctor's office today, so I got my labs rechecked. My blood count is back to normal thanks to all the pills and the two shots in the ass. Yey. I still feel awful but I will try to go back to work tomorrow.

I am also supose to start moving tomorrow, but I have plans to go out Friday night with Mel. Blech. I hope I get to feeling better soon, and I don't over do it.

I think this is the best decision right now, I just hope he doesn't make me regret it.

Tuesday, September 4

Does This Make Me An Offical Blogger Now?

Is it offical that I have forgotten my two years of blogging?

August 20th marked two years of blogging. On that day I blogged about L.L.Bean.

This post also marks 500 post. 500 Post in two years is pretty good considering I took a break for a few months in the beginning.

After battling a 103.3 fever all night long I had to drag myself in to work today so I would get paid. My blood count was off pretty bad, infact before it finished printing the lab tech said "yep, you're sick and you're going home!". I took the lab to the doc and she confirmed I indeed was pretty ill, which makes me happy actually because to feel this bad for three days I better effing be sick! I am off until Thursday pending a follow up appointment and a recheck on my cbc. On top of the 3 advil every three hours and a decongestant I had at home, I was given two shots in the ass (fucking bitch!) and another script for 4 pills a day for the next ten days.

Funny thing is, today one of the doctors I check in for, and her nurse, were sick so I guess we got it from a patient we all had in contact with one day last week. Both of them started getting sick Saturday and their blood counts were off too.

Anyways, I am resting up until Thursday. Keep me in your thoughts. I will know my decision about the move probably on Thursday as well since I think that is his moving day.

Monday, September 3

It Only Took A Week...

Okay, so M is moving out this Thursday or Friday (can't remember) and he asked me to move in with him. He said he was sorry for the split and that he knows what he wants. He said he's willing to work on his issues because it's not worth losing me. I don't know what to do. Damn it. I do love him dearly but a friend of mine asked me to get an apartment together. I think if I moved in with her it would be a great experiance for her and I. However if M is serious about working on his issues I want to give him that chance. Part of me wants to get an apartment with my girlfriend and just see how things go between him and I, but the other part says he's finally waking up. Someone help me!!

I have been so very sick since Saturday and in bed. So I have been trying to rest up I am going to go in to work tomorrow but I will probably get sent home sick. I just hope I get my damn holiday pay especially since this hasn't been much of a holiday!